Mummy & Daddy

All I heard were their loud angry voices. It stopped when he walked away. I thought he was leaving her…and me. I told myself I would not be her and be left, and would not find someone like him who would leave.

Now all I hear is her angry voice and his footsteps out the door. She started it and he didn’t deserve it. Now I understand and must pay the price.

Love Triangle

“My HeroeS": So Different Yet So Similar

I remember when I laid in your arms, broke down, and you kissed my pain away.
I remember when I sat next to him, broke down, and he held my body so tightly.
I remember you getting up and worrying about your priorities and I felt neglected.
I remember him staying here and giving up his plans for me and I felt respected.

I remember when I wrote you poems, your reaction wasn’t what I had expected.
I remember when he wrote me poems, my reaction was what he had expected.
I remember when you fell asleep on my shoulder on the train, but I wasn't giving you my all.
I remember when I fell asleep on his shoulder in the movies cuz I felt he wasn't giving his all.

I remember the first time I fell asleep with you on your bed after we kissed for hours.
I remember the first time he fell asleep with me on my couch after we talked for hours.
I remember the last time I saw you we made love for hours; the last man I was with.
I remember the last time I saw him we just talked for hours; the last man I clicked with.

For you, I was good for one thing. For him, I was good for everything besides"it".

Cyclops loved Jean. Jean loved Cyclops
but her heart, mind, body, and soul belonged to Wolverine.
He loved me. I loved him
but my heart, mind, body, and soul belonged to you. 

Depression

I wish I could tell you...
I found out today I can be considered bi-polar,
but more on the depressed side.

That's why I couldn't drink.
It increased the anxiety and sad feelings.
But when I yelled at you,
I was manic.
When I was ecstatic to see you,
it was because you took me out of my depression.
You  made me feel like shit
when you looked at me and said,
"What's wrong with you?"
What's wrong with me? I'm happy to see you!
You should know that, but you knew
you were an insensitive person all along.
You gave me reason to hate your guts more.
Thanks for understanding.
Your friend suffered from depression,
and you were there for him.
What about me?
You hurt me when you avoided me.
Why couldn't you tell me you loved me,
and just wanted to be alone for a bit?
Why did you prevent me from
participating in your private life?
What the fuck did you have to hide?!

I'm sorry I smothered you.
I overcompensated because
I wanted to be loved by you.
Hope you're having fun without me.
You have washed your hands clean of me.
I'm no longer Brendi. I'm Liz.
You killed your delicate little flower,
and turned her into a bitter bitch at times.
However, she's trying to love herself
the way she wanted you to.
Compliments, hugs, kisses, chocolate,
emotional support, laughter.
I convinced myself I didn't love you,
that it was obsession, that if I loved you,
I wouldn't be changing you into my exes (all 5 of em)
But I still miss you 'cause you were so different.
Calm. But then again, I knew you would explode.

And I didn't want to be the girl to watch you snap!
All that stuff in there will explode when the woman
you fall in love with pisses you off.
And when you scare her away,
and are left all alone because you actually
gave your heart to a "whore" instead of me,
who loved you for no reason,
you will understand what you put me through.
HELL!